Some blogs exist for productive purposes like sharing cookie recipes are informing people of craft activities that they should under no circumstances attempt. This isn’t one of those blogs. They* say to let your freak flag fly, but that’s not really a great way to keep a stable library office job. You only have to climb into a flat of books to lounge and make motions as though swimming while you ad lib almost-lyrics for “Au fond du temple saint” at the top of your lungs once to make a permanent reputation for yourself as “the unstable one” that everyone else starts avoiding**. But if you talk about doing that on the internet, don’t no one freakin’ care, ’cause we’re all too busy Rick-rolling and being outraged by stuff our friends and relatives post on social media. So think of this blog as the pressure valve for one of the many harmless weirdos you see wandering around the grocery store, looking mostly presentable but undeniably talking quietly to themselves and compulsively twitching their fingers as though counting or playing an invisible piano. There may or may not be context. There will probably be religious ranting (I’m Protestant, it’s how we do). It will definitely, however, be unimportant. If any of it happens to amuse you, then all the better.

Happy mocking!

*I don’t know who “they” are, but I know that they exist because I’ve heard this said somewhere.

**It would have been such a flawless, perfect moment if I’d done it, though. Wasted opportunities . . .


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